I tried meditating for a couple of times mostly because I wanted to be spiritual and cool at the same time. That was the problem with religion, it was hard to be cool at it, especially religion where you have to be humble and junk like that. So I came across this India meditation guy in Oprah magazine and thought I would give it a shot. I don’t want you to think I’m into Oprah but her magazine was on the floor at a rest stop toilet in Montana and I picked it up before I had a chance to think about germs. By then I figured I might as well read it since I was going to be there for awhile.
Anyway, this India guy was an expert in meditating which is like church except for the sermon and offering which is okay by me. He was called a grue, which is what those experts in meditation like to call themselves. In the magazine he said that a person had to slow down breathing and focus on chalk. That was a little weird I thought, but, hey, why not give it a shot. So after I got home (I left the magazine at the rest stop for sure) I decided to try the whole meditating thing.
I found an old bathrobe and put it on. It was sort of pinkish and had some holes in it but I figured it would be okay for the first try. Then I sat on the floor and crossed my legs like you’re suppose to. I concentrated on slowing my breathing until I almost passed out which is kind of spiritual of itself. After that I thought of chalk for as long as I could. Now according to the India guy I was supposed to get nervana or something. But since I’ve never had nervana I didn’t know if I got it or not.
Well, that was pretty much it since my legs started hurting and I kind of liked breathing normal. I threw that robe away, mostly due to the fact that I felt like a sissy wearing it. I racked up the meditating thing as one of those things.
Since then I haven’t tried meditating even once, unless you count the time I was at the dentist inhaling nervous oxide. I had some visions there, but the guy had his arms in my mouth which sort of took the spiritualism vibe out.
You SUCK!
The get vibe in man, you got to take meditation seriously not as a way to have fun and practice some weird postures its benefits are real and goes beyond perceptible physical spheres … and about the nirvana state … It´s really extense to talk about but … there you have some light about it.
In sramanic thought, Nirvana (Sanskrit: निर्वाण, Nirvāṇa; Tamil: நிர்வணா; Pali: निब्बान, Nibbāna; Prakrit: णिव्वाण; Thai: นิพพาน, Nípphaan) is the state of being free from suffering, and the cycle of rebirth; as well as mental fetters, mental confusion, and mental poisons in the case of Buddhism. It is an important concept in Hinduism, Buddhism and Jainism.
“Nibbāna” is a Pāli word that means “blowing out” — that is, blowing out the fires of greed, hatred, and delusion.
The one that arrived to this superior stratus was The Buda … The Enlightened one or The Chosen one.
Cosmic Blessings
Maybe you should focus on your chakras rather than chalk.
That would be a first step.
I thought this was hillarious! Nice job there. Chalk on.
To a friend in you, There are so many paths and looking at chalk is one. But you have a choice of many and one of them would suit you. But if you go by simple stats then the whole world , i mean the whole world can’t be crazy going after ONE BEST way. There is atleast one teacher in every city in the world , in 150 countries. THE POWERFUL TECHNIQUE in the WORLD being following by millions and millions today is called Sudarshan Kriya. Go to http://www.artofliving.org , locate the place near you and do the PART 1 Course………… Note it is something you will cherish forever. …………… Your Friend
too funny i myself have been trying this meditation thing and it doesnt seem to work
Ok! go on with your life without meditating and keep unconsciousness! Some people just can’t be conscious, their inner side seems to be too corupt… A pray and special treatment for them…