A talk about nothing

I’m going to talk about nothing. Nothing is something people don’t pay attention to enough mostly because they think nothing is not there. This is a wrong idea for sure. Nothing is very important and we should have respect for it.

There is this saying that nothing comes from nothing. This is totally off and doesn’t mean anything anyway. It’s like saying which comes first the chicken or the chicken? Everybody knows there has to be an egg in there someplace even if it’s the wrong answer. To top it off, religious people believe that God made something out of nothing. That means nothing is something to make something out of. Without nothing even God could not make anything.

But I can’t be interrupted by religion. Science says the same thing except instead of God they have the big bang. It goes like this, there was nothing and then BANG there was something. Scientists don’t know what happened exactly. Maybe some wires got crossed which could cause a bang for sure. But the nothing that was there all of a sudden blew up and we ended up with things like planets and monkees. This theory works pretty well until you try and explain celery, but that is not my problem. The point is that even science has to have nothing to work with to get anything out of the deal.

The issue here is that people think nothing is not something. But nothing is for sure something or we couldn’t even talk about it at all. You can’t talk about nothing if it’s something not there. I don’t know why this is so hard to understand. A person doesn’t even have to think above his mind to get it. So let me go ahead and state the facts about nothing so it’s clear.

  1. Nothing is something that something is not. This is the definition of nothing.
  2. Nothing is needed for everything else to be something other than nothing.
  3. Something can become nothing if it can get over itself.
  4. Nothing is older than everything else because it came first.
  5. Nothing is hard to do because as soon as you notice you’re doing something.
  6. Thinking about nothing is different than thinking about thinking about nothing.
  7. If something did not exist, there would be no nothing either. But having no nothing is not the same thing as having something. Of course, it’s impossible to have no nothing since you wouldn’t be around to have anything.
  8. The saying “better than nothing” is stupid to a person with a headache.
  9. Nothing is what most people have to show for it.
  10. “I have nothing to say” can never be a true statement.

So I hope you can see that nothing is something worth thinking about. I heard somebody say that the big question is why is there something rather than nothing. But I think the big question is where does nothing come from? If God created something out of nothing then he didn’t create nothing due to the fact that creating nothing isn’t doing any creating at all. So basically God is stuck. He can’t take credit for nothing so all he can do is create something else to get credit for. I say that nothing always was and that something else is the new kid on the block. Except I just got interrupted by religion again which I don’t like.

Anyway, you can see that nothing is nothing to be coughed at.

 

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