Minot Flood Guilt Issue

Like I said, I just got back from a flood in Minot, North Dakota. Minot is a town in a valley that got flooded with a bunch of Canadian water from Canada. This is what you call illegal migration if you ask me about it. But that is beyond the point.

Anyway, on my last blog I told you that even though Minot had a bunch of dikes all along the Mouse River there was so much Canadian water that it went over those dikes and ended up flooding the town. Now if this was New Orleans it would be no big due to the fact that New Orleans isn’t worth all that much in the first place. But Minot is a nice place except in winter and when the mosquitos come out in the summer. So the fact that Minot got flooded is a clamity for sure.

Which brings up something I am embarrassed to talk about on a great megaphysical blog like this. But in the interest of disclaimer, I feel like I have to come up front with it since it has something to do with the Minot flood.

Before that Canadian water went over the dikes I was moving my parents’ furniture into a truck. Like I said before, moving furniture is not the best thing for megaphysical thinking which I do a lot of. This might explain why I did what I did that I’m going to tell you about now. Anyway, after moving all that furniture I had to go pee really really bad. It was so bad I was gripping my teeth and sort of hopping from side to side. Well, I climbed to the top of the dike and saw how high the Mouse River was which was really high but not over the dike yet. I looked around and nobody was looking so I peed in the river for about ten minutes straight with maybe a couple of false stops. I was kind of amazed at how much pee there was in me and then I thought to myself that since the river ended back up in Canada (which you would know if you saw my last blog) I thought it would serve those Canadians right if my pee ended up in Canada. This is what you would call poetic justice if you had been up there peeing with me which I’m sort of glad you weren’t. I hate peeing in front of people like for instance in a pubic restroom due to the fact that you have to concentrate on minding your own business which takes a lot of the enjoyment out of it. Anyway, I peed like crazy in that high river.

Well, what I didn’t even think of at that time was that I was adding to the level of that already high river. Before it was just Canadian water which was bad enough. But now it was Canadian water plus you know what. I’m not saying that the flood is totally my fault, but the hard plain fact of the point is that I helped that Mouse River go over the dikes and flood Minot. I am complacent in the crime. This is what happens when you aren’t thinking above your mind and you have to pee at the same time. Nothing good I’m telling you.

So now I am dealing with guilt over this act. I am sorry to all the flooded people in Minot. I wish I could take my pee back but it’s probably too late for that. I hope it helps them to know that my pee will end up in Canada for revenge.


One Response

  1. there is a room waiting for you in Jamestown

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